Tuesday, September 12, 2006

The Plan

Anyway the lawyer dude will be with Buu. You will be known as team Jumpin' Joeshausfaux. Your other three-team members who are currently not here will be Crystal, Oscar, and Zombie Bill. Lawyer Dude you are project manager on this task. Sammy will be watching you perform this task.

The first task shall be defeat that slack jawed loser copycat Deathstroke. He rubs me the wrong way. Even his real name is Slade Wilson, mine's Wade Wilson. He's cramping my style. Also seduce his hawt daughter into sleeping with me. Each project manager will post their plan on how to do this. The other team members are to post their accounts how the mission went and why their project manager sucks donkey balls. My judges shall report back to me what they thought and why they think you accomplished or failed.



Okay so the first challenge was set… I was assigned as project manager. Okay not so hard… Many times I had to sit in while the Black Plague made his dark plans, occasionally stepping in when I felt legal repercussions may follow. Of course it was always my job to find out ways around them.

So it seems we have a copycat…. I could use copyright infringement. Hmmm, only one member of my team is here so I will call upon him…

"Mr. Buu, My name is Tohell, Hugo Tohell. Tell me what are your talents?" I say sitting in my comfortable leather desk chair…

Suddenly my little Djin friend strips his clothes off and starts dancing and singing, "Buu takes off his under pants and see how Buu dance…"

"My eyes.. ugh… I mean good good Mr. Buu, please put your pants on and tell me about any other Talents you may have," Talk about your cruel and unusual punishments, I plop in two Alka-Seltzer tablets in a glass of water….

Mr. Buu then informed me he could turn people into Chocolate. "AH-HAH!"

The little Light bulb went off in my head…

Mr. Buu allow me to tell you "The Plan"…

"I would like you to watch these videos", I place some tapes on the table, Pussycat Dolls', 'Buttons and Don't cha' Fergie's 'London Bridge' just to name a few, "study closely the dances the young ladies. See Mr. Buu I think you have talent and can do these dances so much better than these ladies. While you are studying I will proceed to my office and draw up a few legal documents. I will rent a 'gentles' club' but request none of the ladies be present. My office will then call and arrange a meeting with Mr. Slade Wilson and his Lawyer. I will have documents for him to sign that states he will change his name and refrain from copying Mr. Deadpool in anyway or pay Mr. Deadpool 100% royalties. Of course his Lawyer will argue and say I am wasting their time that I can't win such a case against especially since he will of course blame Mr. Deadpool of doing the copying but we know the truth and we my good friend Mr. Buu will get them to sign. See My friend we will let you be the entertainment and you will do dances and song for them."

I smiled

"I can see it now. His lawyer you try to be professional and advise Mr. Slade Wilson not to sign… Perhaps even after you start dancing but then I will say, 'I think they need a table dance Mr. Buu…'. I will dangle the pen for them to take and sign the documents, if they hesitate I will suggest a lap dance. Mr. Slade Wilson's lawyer will scream, 'fir the love of god man sign!'"

I begin to laugh at my brilliance

"After they sign, then Mr. Buu you will get dressed and turn them both into a box of heart shape chocolate. That you Mr. Buu will deliver to Miss Bea Arthur… You will inform her that the delicious chocolate is from Mr. Deadpool, her number one fan and watch as she eats Mr. Deadpool's troubles away…. "

As I laughed evilly Mr. Buu sat staring at me with this blank look….

"Mr. Deadpool will then get 100% of all royalties from any reruns, death announcements and such by this Deathstroke…"

The Dancing Djin looked at me, "and His daughter?"

"I will get her to sign a contract for some Ravager merchandizing at the expense of her father and in the fine print will be a clause that she has to sleep with Deadpool and that if she breaks the contract She will have to watch you Dance for 30 years. Enraged that her father has betrayed her, She now hates her father, When I visit her I will mention kind of let it slip that her father has forbid her to Sleep with Deadpool…. Even if she isn't afraid of breaking the contract she will sleep with him to get even with her father."

See how nicely that is done….

"MY eyes… Mr. Buu what are you doing?"

"Buu practice dance from video…."

2 Comments:

Blogger J'onn J'onzz, Martian Manhunter said...

Isn't the Ravager dead?

5:07 PM  
Blogger Local Henchmen 432 said...

Not bad so far.

5:59 PM  

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